When I first moved to Durango, my only goal was to climb. And that's pretty much what I did! Weekend trips to Indian Creek, bouldering sessions at Sailing Hawks and after-work limestone pull-fests at Golf Wall were my routine. On holidays, or when I had time off, I would travel the rest of the Southwest and climb in New Mexico, Arizona and Utah. Life was good... But then something happened. It was on Cat Wall...
The day started like any other. Wake up early, breakfast, drive to the wall, gear up, hike and start climbing. However, I felt weird. Something was different! My motivation was gone. I really didn't want to be there. I wouldn't say I was depressed, but anxious about the day. Naturally, I buried those feelings and started the process of supporting my climbing partner. We climbed well on the sandstone spires, and topped out everything we attempted. However, I wasn't psyched.
Enter biking! My new passion, and I took to it like a true addict! I rode everything - trail rides, freeride, downhill and road riding. It was my all, my lover (even, unfortunately, sacrificed some wonderful relationships in my life). Climbing took a HUGE step back. I even shaved my head so I could look me like a cyclist (whatever that means).
Now, I'm back to climbing (and still biking like crazy). I feel an urge to climb everyday. I'm training more. The rock is connecting to my hands like it once did many years ago. I'm finding my ascents again. But I ask myself: what happened before, and will it happen again? Will I lose my passion?
KINETIC from Vast Motion Pictures on Vimeo.
We all lose things in life, but it REALLY sucks when you lose something that sparks you! That passion never dies, it just remains dormant. There is a small pain in your stomach reminding you that you'll need to feed this passion with something else, or return to it (trust me, I know what this is like - especially on the relationship side of the coin). Perhaps that's how it is with adventure sports. Unlike football or basketball, there is the beauty of the mountains, rivers, rocks and oceans that holds us captive like no other. We cannot help ourselves to the splendor in which we perfect our craft. Alas, I don't really know, but I'm hooked again, and love to ramble about it! Climb on!